Wisdom from a Doula
By Addison Landry
My goal is to share ways women can feel supported throughout their pregnancy journey from the wisdom of a Doula. My passion lies in holding space for women to feel truly capable of bringing new life into this world. It brings me joy to see women embrace their fire and bear witness to the power they hold within. I feel that women and families today are not getting the full support that they need. The modern day healthcare system is set up to devalue personal advocacy, emotional care, and the empowerment to trust the innate intelligence within our own bodies. The current system isn’t balanced, in that there is a fear-based focus on a process that is completely natural. This is counterintuitive, as this leads parents further away from inner trust and intuition, pushing them towards being afraid of birth, and feeling they are incapable of trusting such a natural process.
I want women to have faith in the fact that their bodies are powerful, and that they are built to be resilient and experience pregnancy and birth in the way that’s right for them. Since pregnancy has become more of a baby-focused journey, we have lost the art of nurturing the mother, which has been to our detriment. Women have a profound ability to create as they are the vessel in which creation and growth of the future generation take place. It’s of deep importance that we return to viewing birth and pregnancy as a mother-focused journey, because in doing so we begin to change the world.
The journey of getting reconnected with your own instincts as a woman begins with looking at the whole: the mind, body, spirit, and environment. This is a way of thinking that isn’t always valued, because we have been taught to look at everything separately. These different components of the life experience aren’t actually separate from one another, in the same way the leaves of a tree are not separate from its roots.
In looking at the bigger picture, you can find ways to return to balance; this means being able to deliberately shift paths toward things that invoke joy and the settling of the nervous system. There is a difference between pleasure-seeking and doing something that brings you joy. It’s about learning how to differentiate the two through awareness and direction of energy. Pleasure-seeking can often be a secondary action that comes from feeling the need to escape something that is uncomfortable. It’s important to ask yourself, “Is the action I’m about to take going to nourish me or deplete me?” Ultimately, most people deep down know whether something feels right for them; you either feel good in your body or you don’t. Sometimes it’s that simple.
Here are some ideas to help guide you towards nourishment before during and after pregnancy:
Take time to rest- a simple nap will offer your body deep relaxation
Bare feet on the earth- the earth helps support the flow of energy by recycling the negative energy, it’s called earthing. It will help calm the nervous system and having a balanced nervous system reduces our stress response.
Take a bath or dip in the ocean- Water is very calming to the nervous system and can assist with stress relief.
Ask for help- Support from friends and family is vital. Having people around who are willing to care for you, bring meals, provide extra support with babysitting, have catch ups, and support you with domestic tasks can be invaluable.
Eat Quality foods that feel good-
- Organic produce will help you nourish the baby’s growth and support your body strength for pregnancy.
-Good quality fats are needed to support the brain development of the baby and keep your body’s ability to detox smoothly.
-Beets are a great blood-boosting veggie that will help support your heart and increase your blood volume.
- Green leafy veggies will help keep you balanced and regular.
-Stay hydrated (with filtered water if you can)It’s ok to say no- listen to your instincts. Saying no to things that feel depleting is more than ok; this time is for you to ensure you feel as safe and calm as possible.
Body work and emotional support- if this is something you value it’s always great to continue to make time for it during pregnancy. Treat yourself to a massage, acupuncture, movement classes, Reiki, energy healing, and counselor or psychologist visits. Your self-care is important!
What brings you joy- Find the time to do things just because they are joyful and light the fire within you. This could be anything that brings you a sense of ease, flow and bliss. For me, I love to dance, practice kundalini yoga, read and listen to music.
Build a team that supports you- It’s your body, your birth and your experience. You have the choice to build your ideal team. It’s ok to change providers or step away from support that doesn't have your best interests at heart. You as a birthing person are the most important, and when your mother instincts kick in, you will know if something is off...trust that instinct.
Education is key- taking time to learn about your options for all stages of pregnancy allows for you to make choices from a centered place and be a full participant. Avoid allowing too much room for people to step in, take over and make choices for you. It’s your body and if you ever feel unsure about anything—it never hurts to get a second, third and fourth opinion. There are many ways to educate yourself. See the end of this piece for resources I highly recommend.
The journey from depletion to nourishment isn't a straight line. It’s about being able to pick yourself up once something doesn’t feel right, then setting the intention to choose the next best choice towards something that does.
Nourishment and nurturing go hand in hand, and the goal is to nurture yourself like the mother you’re going to be. It’s deeply important to nurture yourself— to become your own mother, because in life (and especially as a parent), you lead by example. A nurtured mum equals a nurtured baby and a nurtured family. It’s important to take care of the self first, to fill your own glass so you can have the energy to share and be present with others.
Based on Kundalini science, pregnancy isn’t solely about the structural development of a child, but about the impact and influence that parents’ daily lives have on the growing baby. Everything you do is impacting the growth and development of the child— emotionally, spiritually, and environmentally. It’s so important for women to feel safe and nurtured. If a pregnant mum needs time to rest, follow that intuition and rest. These 9 months of pregnancy are sacred, and your time is best spent doing the things that you love to do, as these months will profoundly impact your baby and yourself in a way that no other time will. Every woman’s feelings of being safe and nurtured will look and feel differently. It’s important to remember that there is no such thing as the perfect way to spend your pregnancy; our needs are individual and our journeys to motherhood are unique and special.
One of my favorite descriptions of the effects of pregnancy on the further life of the child come from Mystical Mother, a book by Chelsea Ann Wliey, who is a nurse, midwife, and Kundalini teacher. She quotes Alberto Villoldo, a psychologist and medical anthropologist, to validate the impact of parents demeanor, environment, relationships and mental/emotional tendencies on their child in Utero.
“It is thought that as many as half of our maps of reality are formed in the womb, as the mother’s stress hormones pass through the placental barrier to the fetus. So if your mother was not sure she could count on your father to be there and support her, your map will code for a reality in which you can’t count on men to be there for you, or a universe where men will not support your endeavors. If, on the other hand, your mother was confident she could count on her beloved, your mental map will show a world you can count on—and it will create this reality around you.”
Birth has evolved through the ages and the ability to offer medical care during all stages of pregnancy has saved many lives, which I am deeply grateful for. What has also become clear is the increase in the demand for birth support; the desire for birth and postpartum doulas is likely in response to the climbing number of women experiencing disempowerment and unsatisfying childbirth experiences. This shows us that birth relies not only on the medical profession, but on other types of care that provide emotional support, self-advocacy, and innate intelligence.
Doula is a greek word that refers to the caretaking and support of the major life events of birth and death. A birth and postpartum Doula assists with educating, loving, listening, advocating for and assisting a woman before, during and after birth. Our goal is to mother the mother, as she becomes a new version of herself and learns to navigate this new territory while feeling safe and cared for.
A recent study conducted by Continuous Support for Women During Childbirth indicates that having a doula present on the birth team had the following positive effects: a decrease in the overall cesarean rate by 50%; a decrease in the length of labor by 25%; a decrease in the use of synthetic oxytocin (pitocin) by 40%; and a decrease in requests for an epidural by 60%. (Carriage Birth House)
My hope is that you feel the value and importance of building a team around you, that taking care of the mother is the main focus for empowered parenthood, and that you deeply understand that birth is a natural process that you’re divinely created and built for. I advocate for you to have the best birth and postpartum experience possible; this may look like asking family and friends for help, or it could mean hiring a birth or postpartum doula. Either way, it’s about what will support you fully during this life-changing transition. You have everything you need inside yourself, and your inner power will lead the way. I was blessed to witness the birth of my brother at the age of nine. It profoundly altered my life, and pushed me towards learning what I wanted to give to the world. Looking back, I realize that I was there to nurture and support my mother through her 12-hour home birth. I received a gift that day, one that truly and deeply humbled me; I witnessed our ability as women to change the world, that trusting our intuition is vital, and that birth expands our hearts wide open, offering a love so deep, we transform.
Must have Resources:
Empowered birth course with Comune-
https://www.onecommune.com/empowered-birth-hosted-by-schuyler-grant
Mystical motherhood by Chealse Ann Wiley
Fertile by Pritam Atama
Nuture by Erica Chidi Cohen
Spritual midwifery by Ina May Gaskin
Ina May Gaskin guide to child to birth by Ina May Gaskin
The conscious parent by Dr Shefali Tsabary
Birthing within by Rhea Dempsy
The nourishing traditions book of baby and child care By Sally Fallon
By Addison Landry
Addison Landry is an Energetic Nutritionist who has dedicated her life to being a master healer and teacher. Her approach to wellness focuses on providing the tools for you to be own true healer, so she uses energy techniques and education practices that make you to feel empowered in guiding yourself to vitality.