In every relationship there are times when the flame begins to flicker. Some couples are able to re-ignite the flame, whilst others never find the key to bringing the passion back into their relationship. So, what do those who maintain a successful and loving long-term relationship do differently? Here are seven possible answers;
- They focus on their partner’s positive attributes, and tell them how much they appreciate these qualities. Sometimes it can seem difficult to find these, and even harder to communicate them to your partner, but when you do it can change the dynamics of your relationship enormously.
- They listen. I mean REALLY listen. Ask your partner how they are feeling and then simply listen until they have said what they need to say. Remove judgement and show empathy to their feelings, even if you don’t necessarily agree with what they are saying. If you don’t acknowledge your partner’s feelings they will feel unsupported and disrespected, and that is a certain passion killer! Truly listening builds a bridge between you that will re-connect you to the love and passion that you once had.
- They empower their partner. Try being your partner’s number one fan. When they are happy, join in and share their happiness. When they achieve something good then celebrate with them. Pop a bottle of champagne or go out to dinner. When they are going through a stressful time, stand beside them and let them know that you are there to support them.
- They work as a team. So often couples get so caught up in their power struggles they end up feeling like they’re on opposing teams. Try making a pact to get back on the same team, and to work together to solve whatever issues you may be facing. Chances are this approach will enable you to find solutions that you hadn’t previously thought of.
- They are adventurous. Couples who keep the spark alive aren’t afraid to try new things. If you feel stuck in a rut have a think about some things you could do that you normally wouldn’t do, and then just do them! Some may work for you, others mightn’t, but you will have fun trying and you will likely learn more about each other along the way.
- They treat each other the same way as they did when they first met. Couples often wonder why the passion has died, yet they no longer do the things that they did to capture their lover’s heart. Have a think back to those early days. What did you do then that you don’t do now? Try re-establishing some of those habits and your partner will love you for it!
- They commit to continuous improvement in their relationship. If something isn’t working they look at ways to find a solution that works for both of them. They believe that being in love is more important than being right, and accept that it’s ok not to have things exactly how they want them. If you have not made a commitment to continuous improvement, when is now a good time to start?
Matt Glover is a qualified Master Life Coach, Master NLP Practitioner, and Master Ericksonian Hypnotherapist. He is the founder of Happy and Healthy Relationships, and also runs a divorce support meet-up group to provide a forum for people trying to deal with the devastation of a broken relationship. He has a very gentle, easy going manner, and is passionate about helping people to live a wholehearted and abundant life. Book your COMPLIMENTARY 1 Hour introductory session with Matt today, bookings can be made via email or ph: 0416 211 424.